I have cried several times over the past few days sad because I am at home watching the inauguration on TV rather than standing in the cold in DC. I promised myself that I would be there for the next historical event and I am not.

Like others I have felt vested in this election of our new President. I contributed to the campaign with my money and time. I have never cried as much as I have around this election. I really did not want to be here especially not alone watching. Sometimes watching on television can be sickening as reporters struggle to make themselves relevant by attempting to shape news and opinions rather than reporting the news. Why read excerpts of his speech?

How wonderful that we get to watch the changing of the power in our nation. There is a shift in the feel and texture of our nation. Not because Obama is a Black man but rather because we have a new ideology or modus operandi. Yes, I assume that world leaders will give the congratulatory phone calls and express a willingness to work with new administration. This time however the tone will be different. I sense that our standing on the world stage will be transformed by this new energy.

OK, its time for me to go and listen to watch to this historic event. I am truly proud to be an American today.

Now what?

I use to have it all together or so I thought. I one of those who's pretty clear about what gives me joy. I love to speak publicly. I've been in front of audiences big and small, loved that. Sat alone in a booth talking into a mic for 12 years it went out over the radio airways, loved that. I did a lot of writing in the past too, loved that too. I suppose I just love communicating. It helps me sort out what I think. I hope that sounds good to you because its not quite true or truly what I believe. I actually believe that I'm a channel through which information flows.

Honestly, its a bit scary for me to make that admission. I know how others have a tendency to judge the things that don't understand or believe. It causes some to listen more closely and others to disregard whatever else I may say. So there its out. I said it. Now what?