Consider it Done

Organized religion has done a real head job on us. When we buy into it we compartmentalize our lives into something totally unrecognizable. We divide it into the things that seem acceptable and those that are not; when in actuality all of it is who we are. It is no wonder mental ailments are so rampant in our society. Jesus said a house divide against itself cannot stand, many of us are divided within ourselves how can we stand?

I tend have the perception that an all powerful God that could create the Universe would not be a deceiver. He would not give humans or animals faculties that they were not suppose to use. We certainly need to learn appropriateness so that we don't self pleasure in public but that is vastly different from denial or suppression of our natural inclinations.

I often believe that religion without being tempered by common sense causes an internal strife. There is a beauty in being able to listen not only to your body but to your spirit as well and be true to it. Many people live unhappy, unfulfilled lives listening to everything and everybody but themselves & that still small voice that speaks from within. We pretend to trust in God yet don't trust that He speaks to each of us. If we do hear what we heard can't possibly be right. It's too audacious, to good maybe to be true for us or requires more risk than we're willing to take.

To Be Good

Most of us wonder about how different our lives would be if we had made other choices. I know I do. I wonder what I would have done if I grew up believing I was beautiful. Or if I thought it was okay to live a free and adventurous life. It is truly the nature verses nurture question for me. My nature says be out spoken, bold & adventurous. My nurture says a good Baptist girl gets married, has babies, keeps a clean house, joins the PTA and has dinner on the table when her husband gets home. Seeing life in terms of this continuum puts you at a terrible disadvantage. The definition of being good is so narrowly focused that if not this then that. I'm not good therefore I'm bad. These external value judgments cloud the real truth.

At a certain point in our lives we have to stop with the holier than thou attitudes and figure out what it means to have a real relationship with God. In becoming more spiritual and less religious we discover a God that wants us to be happy. That He didn't create us from a cookie cutter destined to monotonous Stafford wives. Spiritualized living recognizes God speaking constantly. Believe it or not when we're more spiritual God becomes more expansive, more powerful weaving in and out of every experience or encounter. We stop limiting God to a book and see Her everywhere actively involved in our lives not standing in judgment but beaconing us to rise.

The Kingdom of God is spread out before us here on earth. It is not only in the good that we see but also in the bad. In this awareness when you're confused simply ask the question God what would you have me see here? And anticipate the answer.

In All & Through All

I was following a friend to shop one day, she was taking her car in for service. We were on the freeway and I was clutching my steering wheel crying and praying out loud about a number of things that just weren't going right in my life. Finally it got to the point that I felt all prayed out, I had that pause where I thought what else? I started that involuntary sniffling we do after a good cry, you know the one where your chest heaves as you try to catch your breath.

I often use my drive time as prayer time as if traffic was some metaphor for life. This morning the traffic was thick and I had been careful to keep my eye on the car ahead of me maintaining what I thought was an acceptable distance. We'd be exiting soon so I was drying my eyes. I wanted the puffiness to go down before I had to get in the car with my friend, I didn't want the questions about why I was crying that was my business. Then out of nowhere this huge 18 wheel semi started cutting over into my lane. Checking my rearview mirror I prayed & screamed not wanting to be hit from behind as I jammed on my brakes. I was screaming all kinds of profanities at that truck.

In a matter of seconds I had gone from praying to cursing calling that driver everything but a child of God. How dare he cut in front of me like that? I could have been killed I thought and uttered a reluctant thank you to God for moving me out of the way. But I fussed at God "why does it have to be so darn hard all the time?" That truck almost hitting me was adding insult to injury or putting salt in a wound. As I was pondering my seemingly terrible lot in life I saw the truck, as if for the first time. Written across the rear door in huge cursive letters was "consider it done." Tears started pouring from my eyes freely as those words penetrated my soul. Consider it done! Thank you God, thank you.